Monday, March 23, 2009

How ACN missed their big chance...


On last night's APPRENTICE, ACN did a brilliant thing- and then they dropped the ball...

Last night's CELEBRITY APPRENTICE show was basically a two-hour commercial for ACN and their new videophone. Now personally, I think videophones are THE PAST since we have the internet, but I accept that not everyone is caught up yet, so they might as well sell the phones to Luddites and reps.

So, they had TWO presentations about the phones to get ACN's "Sales force" hyped up on it- What a BRILLIANT move by ACN.

After the presentatiions, which were watched by millions, they had a real ad, directing everyone to their website http://www.ACNPrimeTime.com

I went their to check it out, and saw how MYOPIC people can be...

When I got their, it gave me an option- "See the videophone in action", which told me how great it was (which was wasste considering I just watched 2 hours of how great it was), and "Learn more about the business opportunity". When you click either of these, the MOST you could do was "request an ACN rep" to contact you.

ACN- YOU FAIL.

Why do I say that? Well- here they had a chance to SELL VIDEOPHONES. If they had just put up "Get the videophone for (however much) and get two for (however much) and get the second one to be delivered to your friend or loved one free", they would have CLEANED UP.

More than that, they would have had MORE PEOPLE USING THE PHONE.

Then, they should have just added a RANDOMIZER to let the sale go to ANY of their reps, and given their reps some free commissions, along with the purchaser's info, so they could contact them later and ask about the phone.

Also, during the sale, they could have told them "Join the biz opp, and get this phone for a discount", and upgraded people AUTOMATICALLY, and ALSO given their reps free, random reps.

BUT NO.

Because they have those "MLM GLASSES" on SO TIGHT, they didn't remember to keep the main thing the main thing- which is to SELL PHONES, and create a LOYAL CUSTOMER BASE.

Now, of the many millions who watched and went to the site, I am sure that far too many of them left the site without ever knowing how much the phones cost, nor left any information at all.

ACN- you missed your BIG CHANCE. Next time, call me!

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Welcome Colored People!

Wow- Macy's has gotten TWO of the four "Sucky Ads" so far- It's not that I'm around Macy's or anything, they just seem to have SUCKY ADS.

Last night Laura and I went to see "August: Osage county", a drama on broadway (talk about DRAMATIC), and in the Playbill was this SUCKY AD for Macy's:



I think it's supposed to be an ad for colorful clothing, but instead, we get a woman dressed in black and white, and the only COLOR to be found aside from the red slogan is the WOMAN'S COLOR!!

So, Macy's are you telling me to welcome back COLORED PEOPLE? Is this an OBAMA thing? Maybe a new policy at Macy's- "We at Macy's now allow colored people- Welcome Back Color!"

Wow Macy's- You get the award for a SUCKY AD!!

Saturday, February 7, 2009

No- Politically correct is NOT an Ad campaign...



Wow- how dumb is this? They are trying to sell these wear-on-your-face tv screens, which ARE cool- I mean, I have a pair (not this brand).
However, 2 things:

1- I never use them.

2- If I WERE to use them, and I were a thick-necked guy, I would NEVER wear them for OLD MOVIES... I would wear them for the BIG FOOTBALL GAME-

Oh, but I see- you've covered that crowd:


Only a boardroom (excuse me- BOREDroom) would say: "Oh yeah, we'll show the HOT WOMAN watching the football game- That'll confuse them into buying!"

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

They may sell, but only because they're the only one advertising these at all.
I've got an idea- get the boredroom people, strap these glasses on them, and make them a powerpoint of watch their ads cost more than their sales.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Even the MONKS are doing it!



I saw this ad in the NYC Subway- I put this ad on here not because it sucks, but because I wanted to show you that even the MONKS understand that times are changing- I don't know if the Franciscans are advertising in the right pool (NYC Subway?), but hey- you never know.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Umm... Welcome Back STUPIDITY....

So, I'm walking in Macy's with my wife, and we see this ad:


It says "Welcome back Color". See anything wrong with it?
THERE'S ONLY ONE COLOR ON DISPLAY! And BLUE is hardly a fashion statement.

So what did I do? I IGNORED it except to say "wow- that's stupid!"
If they wanted me to look at COLORS, maybe give me a display with all sorts of mannequins in different... COLORS, all hanging out together. Then I might say to myself "Ooh- that yellow outfit is cool- I'm gonna get that, and while I'm at it, I'll get that green too!" Instead, I saw NOTHING, and bought NOTHING.